Batman Hates Halloween III
by Sonata-Time-Nocturne-Flare-Aoi
Summary: Complete! Parody Fic! The eccentric millionaire hero Bruce Wayne has had it with being harassed by the villains of Gotham every year on Halloween. This time around he has a foolproof plan to not get pranked. Or does he? Rated T.
1. Chapter 1

**Story**: Batman Hates Halloween III  
**Author**: Master Jin Sonata  
**Written**: October 30th, 2010  
**Genre**: Humor  
**Rating**: T (Language, Violence, Comic Mischief)  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own DC or its increasingly frustrated caped crusader.

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**Part 1 of 2**

For two years straight, Bruce Wayne has been tormented every Halloween by the Joker and his cohorts. The events happening the previous two years has caused our eccentric millionaire hero to devise a foolproof plan to ensure that he would not be bothered on this holiday.

"**You're going to lock yourself in the Bat Cave? Are you sure that's a good idea, Master Bruce?"**

Bruce and his butler Alfred were both busy carrying various items of survival down into the depths of the Bat Cave. These items included food rations, water, extra weaponry and ammo to name a few.

"**Of course this is a good idea, Alfred. I am sick and tired of Joker humiliating me every year on this cursed holiday! So this time around I'm going to spend the weekend down here in the Bat Cave until this nightmarish occasion is over,"** Bruce responds.

After setting the supplies down, his butler began to leave, but not before questioning him once more.

"**Just out of curiosity, Master Bruce, who will answer the city's call if Gotham is attacked?"** Alfred inquires.

"**I'll leave things to the Justice League… or the Avengers, whomever is closer,"** Bruce responds as he takes a seat at his control panel.

"**Very well. I will see you in two days then,"** Alfred says as he exits the Bat Cave, shutting and barring the door from the outside as instructed.

Bruce pops open a can of soda and pulls out a nice long novel to read in the duration of his stay.

"**Ah…peace and quiet. It feels kinda good to take a break once in a while from the crimes of Gotham and those bratty its trick-or-treating kids,"** he says to himself.

"**You said it, Bat Face,"** said a voice from right next to him.

Bruce puts down his book and looks to his left.

Sitting right next to him was none other than the Joker.

"**YOU!"** Bruce yelps as he leaped out of his seat and ran straight toward his weapons rack, grabbing a sword from the selection of armaments. **"HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET IN HERE?"**

Joker just sat there with an amused look on his face.

"**Why so serious? Broke in here hours ago to spend some time with you this Halloween. Doesn't that sound like fun?"** the Joker entices him, before breaking out into a laugh.

"**Shit…I'm stuck here with my arch-foe and there's no way to get out of here until Halloween ends…"** Bruce mutters to himself.

He could just go Batman on his ass and tie the Joker up somewhere, but seeing how his yearly attempts of staying one step ahead of any villain on this day ultimately fails anyway, he decides to give in and humor the Joker for once.

"**What do you have in mind for entertainment?"** Bruce mutters dejectedly at the white-faced clown.

The Joker smiles menacingly.

"**Well…"** he said thoughtfully.

**End of Part 1**

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**What will Joker do to Bruce for the Halloween weekend? Continue to chapter 2!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2 of 2**

The Joker's stay in the Bat Cave during the Halloween weekend was interesting to say the least.

If he wasn't trying out Bruce Wayne's various Batman outfits, playing around with his utility belt gadgets, or taking his Bat Mobile for a joyride and nearly crashing it into the cavern depths, the clown prince of chaos spent a good portion of his time contacting the other villains via Bruce's control panel.

"**Hey Penguin! This is Joker! Guess what? I'm calling you from the Bat Cave! No I'm serious! Bat-Face? No he's not out of the picture, he's just sitting next to me watching as I have fun with his toys!"** Joker says to the on-screen communicator.

Bruce Wayne just sat there with bloodshot eyes and a five-o-clock shadow on his face. He hadn't been to sleep at all the whole weekend thanks the nemesis's seemingly endless supply of energy.

"**Aren't you finished? Halloween has been over for three days,"** Bruce grumbles to his foe.

At that moment, the entrance to the Bat Cave opened up. Alfred as here to check upon Bruce.

Joker spun around in his chair like a little kid before jumping off of it.

"**Oh I suppose I'm finished. I've broken nearly all of your equipment, but hey, I'm sure you can just buy new ones, right?"** Joker responds with an amused smile.

"**Good, then get out,"** Bruce says rather grumpily.

The Joker did a little victory dance toward the center of the room before waving to Bruce.

"**Well it's been fun, Bat-Face! We should do this again next year, and I'll be sure into invite the others here as well," **Joker spoke to him before taking out a smoke bomb from his jacket and tossing it onto the ground, disappearing within the cloud.

Alfred reaches the base of the Cave and stops next to Bruce.

"**My my, Master Bruce, you look awful. Come and get some rest? I've prepared your bed for you."**

"**Thanks Alfred, I'll do just that,"** Bruce commented, deciding not to mention that he had a little company here for the past few days.

A bit later after Bruce got himself cleaned up, he entered into his bedroom and laid down to rest.

"**Ahh, now this is more like it. Finally…some peace…and quie-"**

**SPROING!**

**CRAAAASHHH!**

Bruce's words were cut off suddenly as he was suddenly catapulted out of his bed and was sent crashing out of a nearby window.

Alfred walks into the bedroom shortly after, and pulls off his mask.

It was the Joker in disguise.

"**Gotcha, Bat-Face! Heeheehaahaahaa!"** the Joker laughs hysterically as he now had complete control of Wayne Mansion.

It was all according to plan.

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**The End!**

**Hope you had a great Halloween! Please review, and see you next year for more exploits of our caped hero!**

**Missed the previous two installments? Check out Batman Hates Halloween I & II, in our story archive!**


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